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Bessie

Bessie

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The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden (The Coincidence, #1)

The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden (The Coincidence, #1) - Jessica Sorensen I spammed this book with notes - on my kindle (app). Not nice notes either. There were too many places throughout it that just didn't work for me, I guess.It started with quite a lot of blood.I noted that I hoped the author would figure out some other illustrations, and she did: scares. At least I could stop squirming.I had much trouble finding the story believable. I was a mere 5 % into it and as Callie was fleeing from a guy - the guy - and "the insinuation of his voice" I was thinking: Really? Really? ... Really though?There was a lot of repetition. Like it would be mentioned over an over again that Callie had not been herself since sixth grade, she had not let anybody in since sixth grade, she had not looked herself since sixth grade, she had been quiet, looked sad, ect., since sixth grade. A little variation in the description here and there would be nice. A lesser use of words like "ass", "fuck", "boobs" would have helped me out some as well. I wouldn't consider myself a prude but the (excessive) use of these words in this book just didn't contribute anything positive to it. I imagine that the thought was for it to be an 'authentic' portrayal of the thoughts/talking of teenagers, but mostly - for me - it conflicted with the rest of the writing in the story. On top of that there were so many unnecessary descriptions. Just taking up space.And I kept stumbling on things that would make me mind go: How does s/he know that - did s/he just read his/her mind? What are the chances s/he actually noticed/remembered that? What?! - Is that what s/he's thinking at that moment?? Fx when Kayden runs in to Callie the first time on campus but doesn't recognize her. He asks Luke about her, and Luke immediately goes: She kind of remind me of the quiet girl we used to go to school with. What are the chances?? Even if she does/did remind Luke of his dead sister? It confused me. I'm wondering if the story would have benefited from on omniscient narrator. I'm not sure it would, but the choice of first person narrators sets certain limits or challenges for the author when portraying the characters and I'm not at all sure I felt that this author respected those. Or that her overlooking them was fully intentional. To me that's a bit of a problem.Over all the writing style just wasn't that great either. The best way I can put it is: It lacked some effort. That was the feeling I was left with.Most of the time I'm not one for scrutinizing a book. If the writings not awful and the plot is somewhat decent and the love story's sweet I can deal. Most of the time. This time the good points didn't outweigh my annoyance though. The main story is nothing new. It does not in any way touch upon things that haven't been dealt with before. Worse it does not do this in a great, new way. This is not to say that the premise of the story is bad or that a plot can't be predictable and still be great; It's to say that - to me - this plot in this particular book has been poorly executed. I read through it but I didn't feel connected to the characters. At all. There is a second installment due for release sometimes this year. I probably won't be picking that up.On the bright side: It was a very quick read.